Saturday, August 8, 2009

It's hard to find good help these days

If you are going to do a job, it's always a good idea to know how to do your job. If you hire someone to do a job you should train them to do the job if necessary.

A few days ago I went out with my wife to celebrate the anniversary of the day my mom went through great torment to rid me of her body. In the process I came across two incompetent bartenders.

#1
Leinenkugel's brewery is a "craft" brewer (now swallowed up by a big corporation) in Wisconsin that has for years provided my area with fine beer. At one location I ordered a Leinie's Amber. What I got was a Leinie's Honey Weiss. I pointed out the error assuming she made a simple mistake, but she hadn't. She went to the correct tap (the one labeled Amber) and out flowed Honey Wiess. She drew some beer off of the Honey Wiess tap and out flowed something like Bud Light. Oops, someone must have connected the kegs wrong. She went and checked the kegs, but returned claiming they were correct. Maybe from what she could tell, they were correct, but from what was in the glasses, I could tell things were not correct. The bartender would not believe me that the beers were wrong. Eventhough the empirical and analytical data suggested a problem, she would not be persuaded. I didn't stick around to do more research, but here is the conclusion I could make: Honey Wiess was coming out of the Amber tap, Bud Light (or any other light macrobrew) was coming out of the Honey Weiss tap, and Sam Adams was coming out of the Sam Adams tap. 1 out of 3 will get you in the Hall of Fame.

#2

Different place. While I do love beer, I also like me a good cocktail. We went to one of those classy joints that has about 30 special drinks on a menu. These drinks range from martinis to chocolate drinks to whisky drinks. The first drink I ordered was prepared to perfection by bartender #1. I was pleased, but he left and for my second drink I had to deal with bartender #2. I said, "I'd like a Johnny Walker Manhattan, please." She looked at me with a look of complete confusion and said, "You're going to have to help me with that one." I explained a bit further that I wanted a Manhattan made with Johnny Walker (Red of course, I'm not rich enough for the Black and certainly not the Blue). She was still confused so I had to walk her through the whole drink making process from the whisky to the sweet vermouth to the cherries. To make this worse, a Mahattan was listed on their menu!!! I didn't leave a tip, which for me is VERY unusual.

After that my wife and I decided to go to a place where we could get our drinks made correctly. So, we went home.

2 comments:

Adam L. said...

Back when I was a waiter (and 18 years old) I often had to clarify what patrons were ordering because I simply didn't know what the drink was (someone had ordered a Tom Collins, for example, which I only knew as a character from Rent).

Fortunately, the bartenders were farm more experienced than I was and actually made the drinks. Lucky me.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

How can you NOT know how to make a Manhattan?

I once tried to order a Manhattan at a bar, and the bartender looked at me and said "You don't want a Manhattan." I cocked an eyebrow and responded with "if you don't know how to make it, just say so." I got my Manhattan. Poorly made and probably with penis leavings after he wiped himself on the inside of my drink, but I got my Manhattan nonetheless.