Ag sucks

Congratulations to our neighbors to the north. You can have your Au. Hell of a game though, eh? Ah geez. We had it and den we din't.

If the bulk of Canadians[1] weren't such nice folk, I'd be real pissed off. Instead, since I live in Minnesota[2] and since I appreciate good hockey, I'm willing to let this one slide, fellas.

But geez, we almost had it. Curse that Gretzky version 2.0 fella.[3]

All I can say is, Horray North America!!!!!! Yeah, take that, World!!!

[1] in my experience, mostly those to the west of the French speakers and those to the east of the French speakers.

[2] Considered by some to be the southern-most province of Canada.

[3] geez, it took like 2 minutes for someone (probably from Nova Scotia) to update his Wikipedia page to include his game winning goal. God bless the internets.

Sporadicism

OK, I'm not going to totally quit blogging. But, I am going to fall into the typical pattern of a dying blog. I'll sporadically blog until I totally stop. It could get ugly and uncomfortable. Feel free to just look away.

Beside, I still have things to say that the world cannot do without!

First of all, which USA state has provided the most olympians for the 2010 Winter olympics in Vancouver?

If you said any state other than Minnesota, you would be wrong.

Minnesota has provided 21 world class athletes to represent the USA in Vancouver during the 2010 Olympics. That's more than any other state. Many are involved in hockey or curling, but a few are involved in skiing. Curling and hockey make sense, but the skiing doesn't. The longest ski run in Minnesota is about 35 feet.

Here's one of them skiers:

hmmmmm. I don't think this picture of Lindsay Vonn was taken in Minnesota. Not even the Duluth area.

Secondly, apparently the NBA is running its All-star game. Sorry, the world quit caring about that in 1988.

It still stinks

After spending a week wallowing in a state of self-pity, I've come to a few conclusions about the Vikings loss in the NFC championship game.

1. Without Brett Favre the Vikings don't play in the Championship
2. Brett Favre is, as he was for Green Bay, the Vikings greatest asset and greatest liability
3. However, Favre did not lose the game, Adrian Peterson did with his fumbles (despite an otherwise great game).
4. The Vikings should have been able to score at least 13 more points than they did. Those chances were fumbled away.
5. The Defense was superb... right up until overtime.
6. Uncatchable balls are uncatchable. How can an uncatchable pass be interfered with.
7. I don't mind ending sentences with prepositions.
8. After the lose, I was amazed at how emotionally exhausting it is having a successful sports team.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12.... hmmm

When the math gets hard and heavy in General Chemistry, and my students get frustrated, I tell my students that if they can count to 5, they have the math skills needed to handle about 90% of what we cover in Organic Chemistry.

For those of you not into chemistry, carbon can only form 4 bonds. I tell my organic students to count the bonds to carbon and if they get to 5, something is wrong.

My beloved Vikings need something similar to the number 12. Despite all of the stupid mistakes they made last night, they actually had a chance to win the game until they got penalized for having 12 men in the huddle...after a time out!!!!

From now on, they should hire someone who's only job is to count the people on the field. If that person gets to 12, they should alert the coach.

Of course, in the scenario last night, there was nothing they could have done. They can't call back to back time outs. The blame lies squarely on the coaching staff. And then of course, Brett Farve decided to once again dash the hopes of a long suffering fan base by throwing in interception.....

I know, I was going to quit blogging, but this is cathartic.

OK, say with me:

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

uh oh!!!!!!!!!!!!

Things I hate.

1. Brett Farve
2. Turnovers

Hey sportsfans...

Don't tell me this isn't impressive.

He should but won't

Ndamukong Suh should win the Heisman trophy, but he probably won't. Even after manhandling a fellow Heisman finalist in the Big 12 Championship game (see above), that may not be enough to push him over the top. The Heisman Trophy is essentially an offensive player award.

A short post to follow the long post

OK, so my last post was too freakin' long. But, it could have been longer. I could have gone into how even though they took my water heater back, the folks at Lowe's didn't offer much in the way of help picking one out.

Regardless or irregardless, what's done is done.

Midterm break is here... or Fall break or MEA... whatever it is actually called, I have a 4 day weekend.

I bemoan the fact that I have no sports to watch tonight. None. Yeah, I know the MLB playoffs are on, but I don't care since my beloved Twins are done. The Viking don't play until Sunday. The Huskers are taking on Texas Tech but not until Saturday.

*sigh*

I guess I will have to grade mid-term exams. YUCK

enough is enough

Since I'm on a sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports theme I'd just like to say the following:

When throwback jerseys were first introduced in the NFL back in 1994, it was a neat idea, at best. But, it is an idea that ran its course long ago. Now, throwback jerseys are incredibly annoying and stupid. Pick a jersey and stick with it.

ugh!!!

Game blown in the 9th by the best Twins closer in their history. Ugh!!

Horrible call by ump in 10th. Ugh!!

Bases loaded, zero outs. Result: no runs. Ugh!!

How annoying. At least we have this.

and at least ice fishing season is approaching:

At least I'm not this angry

I'm a sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports, sports kind of guy. And, it is a well documented fact that I'm not a huge fan of Brett Favre being a Minnesota Viking. For the past decade (or so) he has meant nothing but annoyance for me and my fellow fans.

However, at least I am not this bad!!! See also: this!!!

Seriously people. It's only a game. No need to sacrifice a goat over it.

Sorry, I've been away for a while

I spent the last several days in an isolated part of Northern Wisconsin camping with family. It was nice to be unplugged from the rest of the world. No internet, no cell phone, no newspaper, nothing.

So, did anything interesting happen while I was gone????

This thing sucks

I've written about my lack of love for the H.H.H. Metrodome where the Twins play. Part of it is that I prefer baseball outside and being in this overgrown bubble just isn't the best place for baseball. Now I have proof that the Metrodome sucks:

You'll have to click on the image to see what I'm talking about.

New coach for my NBA team

I admit it. I am a Minnesota Timberwolves fan. There! I admitted it. Step one.

The T-wolves have fallen on hard times...again. With the exception of a few weeks during the Kevin Garnett MVP season, the hard times are the only times we T-Wolf fans know. The Clippers of the Midwest.

Today, the Timberwolves hired former Laker player and current Laker assistant coach Kurt Rambis as their new head coach. Well, I don't know if this will help matters, but it does provide me with some blog fodder. Let's go....

First of all, I am a little concerned about the confusion that this may cause. You see, Kurt Rambis looks an aweful lot like our governor.

Here is Rambis:

Here is Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty:
Much too similar. The cases of mistaken identity will sky rocket in MN as Gov. Pawlenty will constantly be asked how he is going to handle the full court press and a young squad made up of 3 point gaurds while Coach Rambis will constantly be asked how he plans to reduce the budget shortfall and about his thoughts on light rail. People can expect an abundance confused looks and blank stares.

Here is my solution. I suggest, nay, I demand that Rambis adopt his look of old like this:
No one will confuse him for anyone else.

My second gripe. Hey LA, if you are going to steal a basketball team from Minnesota, maybe you should change the freakin name!!! Good grief. Show me a lake in L.A. and I will show you an emergency drinking water supply!!!

Whew!!!

Thank God!!!! Now leave us alone. Heliocentrism is back in. Favrecentrism is out. Or at least, it damn well better be.

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On another note, I've been busy with vacation and family obligations. I will be brewing my lager tomorrow. I will keep you posted.

Let's explode this thing

My wife and I took my two oldest kids to a Minnesota Twins game today. My beloved Twins took on the Indians of Cleveland. It was a noon game so it worked out great for the kids.

The Twins promptly shellacked the Indians with 4 homeruns, much to the delight of my kids. They are still too young to appreciate the nuances associated with baseball, so the crowd pleasing long balls help. The Twins won 11-3. I was proud that my kids lasted the whole 9 innings (the cotton candy helped).

I took some pictures:

The Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome will be replaced next season by Target field. The dome will still be used by the Vikings, but thankfully, baseball will once again be played under the sun in Minnesota.

Every time I go to the Dome, I can't help but notice something. Here is a picture of the roof. Notice anything?
Here's a closeup of the middle.
That's right. The HHH Metrodome is a bigotted bastard and Nazi sympathizer. Who is the moron that designed that stupid roof.

I hope that someday, instead of imploding the thing like they did to the Kingdome, I hope they fill it up with air until the think pops.

Worst time of the year.

As a sports fan, this is one of the worst times of the year. The NCAA basketball tourney started last Thursday in typical fashion with a flurry of activity. During the course of 4 days, 50 basketball games were played. Some were good, some were almost great, some were boring, some were stupid, and some were downright bad.

The games were done by late Sunday afternoon and now....... now we have to wait!! I hate this time of year.

I'm not the biggest college basketball fan. I pay casual attention during the season, but I get really interested during the tournament. After the first 4 days of work-skipping action, I need more.

It's like doing crack for the first time and then having to wait a few days to get your next hit. [FYI I know nothing about this]

So now we wait until Thursday until our next hit. Pitiful? Yes, no doubt. The good news is that when the championship rolls around, I will be burnt out on college basketball. Then I won't care.

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In related news, Tubby is staying. At least that's what he says. This is unusual for us Minnesotans. We do not know how to deal with rumors that someone is lusting after the head coach of one our sports teams.
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While the Gopher basketball team is done, we can now turn our attention to the annual event known as "Minnesota Plays in the NCAA Hockey Tournament." Like clockwork, the powerhouse Minnesota Gopher Hockey team will be playing in the tournament just like they do every year.... wait a minute.... what the f***???.... AH CRAP!!!!!