Random thought as I randomly post sporadically

In the USA, yesterday was census day. Stand and be counted. I must admit, I still need to send in my census stuff. The USA Today published some interesting data on census participation. How does your state stack up? Notice that the highest participation rate is for states in the Midwest! Horray Midwesterners!!!! We are so responsible.

But, I was wondering. Where do these percentages come from? Let's review some math.

A percentage is mathematically described as the part over the whole times 100. In this specific example it is the number of people that responded divided by the total number of people in the state times 100.

But wait, the purpose of the census is to count the total number of people in the state. How can the percent be calculated if the total number of people isn't even known?

One equation with two unknowns cannot be solved.

The ACS national conference is coming up. The theme is sustainability. The keynote speech is Green Chemistry: Chemical Solutions for a Sustainable World. The whole "green" thing reminded me of a post I wrote almost 2 years ago. Since I'm semi-retired from blogging, I thought I'd do a little reposting to fill up the space.

Here is my opinion of "going green" from a May 2008 post.

=======================

I think of a lot of things. Recently, when the trees were finally forming leaves[1], I was thinking about chlorophyll. The area is finally turning green and the amount of chlorophyll being produced by trees is no doubt in the "ton" range.[2]

I got to thinking about the visible spectrum of chlorophyll a and b. Here is a picture from Wikipedia:
Do you notice anything? Look at the spectrum again and think about it for a second.

Let me ask you this: Why do leaves (most of them) look green?

Yup, because they don't absorb the green wavelengths of light. They don't absorb anything in the 500-550 nm range. In other words, green plants reject the color green!!!!

Allow me to personify. Plants hate green and they will have nothing to do with it. That is why they do not absorb green wavelengths of light. Plants DO like blue and red light. They absorb those wavelengths with glee. Plants hate green and love blue and red.

If you care about plants (and I hope you do because your survival depends on them) you should have the courtesy to reject what plants reject: GREEN.

I'm in favor of plants so I will not "Go Green" for anything. I will "Go Red and Blue". That's what plants like, and I like plants.


[1] We're still waiting for solid Spring weather.
[2] That would be an interesting calculation to figure out what mass of chlorophyll (all types) are stored in one tree.

WT-WTF?

There are not enough 'WTFs' for this one.

A chemistry student in the Ukraine was found dead with his jaw blown off by what is believed to be exploding chewing gum, according to reports.

It gets a bit more interesting:

The student apparently had a bizarre habit of chewing gum after dipping it into citric acid, Russian news agency Ria Novosti said.

Officers found both citric acid packets and a similar-looking unidentified substance, believed to be some kind of explosive material, on a table near the body, the agency continued.

Investigators suspect that the student simply confused the packets and put gum covered with explosive material into his mouth.

WHAT THE HARTREE-FOCK!!!!!! What did have sitting next to his citric acid that was capable of blowing his jaw off?

Devistating

The finest in all media outlets:

We all make mistakes. At least it was changed moments later. Still, it's a bit embarrassing.

Sorry, I've been away for a while

I spent the last several days in an isolated part of Northern Wisconsin camping with family. It was nice to be unplugged from the rest of the world. No internet, no cell phone, no newspaper, nothing.

So, did anything interesting happen while I was gone????

Night of the living raccoon dead.

E over at *E* Deconstructed posted a post (which is the best thing to do with a post) about, among other things, the guilt she felt for flattening a raccoon. While I'm not one to celebrate and enjoy the destruction of one of God's special creatures, in this case, I don't feel too bad (as long as the death was quick and painless).

Last week, the fam and I took a little camping trip to the southern part of Minnesota. We (the six of us) are tenters. No miniature house for us. Just a thin layer of slightly water repelling nylon (?) between us and nature.

At our first campsite, when dusk hit, I knew we were not alone. My two youngest were sleeping, my wife took the older two to the potty. I sat alone by the campfire when I realized something was walking next to me in the dark. I turned expecting to see a familiar face when instead I turned and found myself face to face with a bandit masked rodent. I jumped a tad and shooed it away thinking, "what a wonderful encounter with nature. I'm glad I got it to leave" Little did I know, he had friends.

Late that night, after all the kids were in bed, a steady stream of raccoons started to enter our campsite. At first, it was one or two at a time, and they were either searching for scraps of food or, as I am inclined to believe, scraps of human flesh. Finally, my wife gave up and went to bed leaving me to defend my family from the rabid horde.

For about 15 minutes all was quiet until the raccoon version of Shaun of the Dead began. I was sitting in my chair by a dying campfire while reading (with head lamp) a book. Three coons came out of the forest to my right. I threw some rocks at them and scared them off, but I didn't notice the other three on my left until they were two feet away. I turned my attention to my left flank and using rocks I sent those back into the woods only to realize the ones on my right were returning. In addition, there was another group at my 12 o'clock position beginning an assault on my position. In a near paniced state, I started throwing rocks to my left, right and forward position to repel the evil when the thought to check my rear entered my mind. Sure enough, there were coons behind me. I was surrounded. Using pieces of firewood as artillery, I made a hasty retreat to the family minivan where I holed up for 10 minutes waiting for the undead to find their scraps of food (which there was very little of as I run a tight and clean camping outfit) and leave. They finally moved on. I was in the clear. I hurried off to pee in the woods and go to bed. I fell asleep to the constant sounds of raccoons fighting and scavenging,

In the morning, after changing two poopy diapers, I headed off to the dumpster to dispose of the befouled polyacrylate. Certain that daylight had rendered the raccoon danger null, I opened the dumpster lid only to be face-to-face with a raccon. This raccoon however, was young and apparently incapable of escaping its dumpster dive. I threw the dirty diapers on its head and left feeling very little pity.

HF is in what?

Today in Pennsylvania, a truck carrying hydrofluoric acid (HF) overturned. CNN.com had a story about it. As so often happens, the main stream media continues to display a certain degree of scientific illiteracy.

In the story the author wrote:

It also is an ingredient in high-octane gasoline, refrigerants, aluminum and light bulbs.

HF is indeed a nasty little molecule that demands a great deal of respect, but I can assure you, it is NOT an ingredient in gasoline, refrigerants, aluminum and light bulbs. HF is used in the manufacturing of these things, but it is not an ingredient. A subtle difference, but an important one. Even a quick Wikipedia search could have helped.

If you don't understand science, don't write AP stories related to science. That's why I don't write AP stories about poetry, cricket or knitting. I know what these things are, but I don't know enough to be accurate.

NOTE: I was going include a picture showing some HF accidents, but some of them were too gruesome. I didn't want to gross out any unsuspecting reader. Do your own search.

Titletown

Minneapolis. The town that gave you Target, The Lakers, Flour, the '87 and '91 Twins and Prince now has something else to brag about.

They drink more Irish whiskey[1] than any other town in the world[2]. Take that Dublin pubs!!!!

22 bottles a day.

[1] specifically Jameson.
[2] at one specific location

Fluff post of the week

I have some really cools pictures to post as soon as I get the chance. Hopefully, tonight.

Until then, check out this guy.

My favorite line: "An instructor from a local modeling agency judged the women on the way they looked, how they sang and how much alcohol they could hold, the Shanghai Daily said."

That's exactly how I picked my wife. Uncanny.

I will be attending

I got this email today:
I'm going. I'll be sure to drink a lot of coffee before I go.


Sorry for the crappy resolution. Blogger didn't want to cooperate.

Word of the day

Stupidiculous.

10 seconds of my 15 minutes has been used

Today I was asked by a local TV station to help with some demonstrations for their news program to illustrate how freakin' cold it is in Minnesota. This morning the temp was -25°F. That's freakin' cold, my friends.[1]

I went to the station and we taped a few minutes of using a frozen banana to hammer a nail, blowing bubbles and watching them freeze and "popping" balloons. The edited footage was going to air tonight on the nine o'clock news.

Well, it turns out the big CBS news show with Katie Couric called down to the minor leagues for some video foder to fill up their national newscast. Long story short, they lumped about 10 seconds of the footage we shot into a story about how freakin' cold it is.

Here's the video. I'm the ugly bastard at about 1:37 using a banana to pound a nail.

Watch CBS Videos Online

So, what that means is I have 14:50 seconds of fame left.


[1] I must include a disclaimer here. While it is freakin' cold here in Minnesota, we must remember that there is an entire country further to the north of Minnesota (and another state). When it's freakin' cold here, it's usually f*cking cold in Canada.

detartrated

As I sit here getting a bit loopy from the toluene and methyl ethyl ketone fumes from the contact cement I am using to attach the oak veneer to my bar top, all I can think of is: shouldn't palindrome be spelled 'palinilap?'

TACOCAT

Can I get a break from life for a minute????

Just when things were settling down from the previous craziness, my 3 year old broke her arm tonight. Poor kid, but man is she tough.

Long story short:
She was running in the house. Dad (that's me) yells, "slow down before someone gets hurt." She trips and smacks her hand on a book shelf. Stupid books. What are they good for anyways. She cries inconsolably which is very uncharacteristic for her as she is tougher than me. Something is wrong. ER. X-rays. Yup, broken radius. Stupid bookshelf. Cast. Sling. We go home. She eats a bunch of pizza sans the use of her dominate hand. It doesn't slow her down and self-pity is unknown to her. What a kid.

Stupid books and their shelves.

Opportunity missed

About a year ago I wrote a post about the traditional pardon for the National Thanksgiving Turkey.

I had suggested that maybe this time Bush could not issue the pardon. He did.

Opportunity missed to have a nice fresh turkey dinner.

Have a great Thanksgiving America.

How do some people get their jobs?

Have you ever wondered how some people get their jobs? I often do.

If you are in charge of getting polar bears to breed, you might want to, for example, be able to tell the difference between boys and girls. Just a thought. Apparently, in Japan it's not important.

Oh, to be a fly on the wall.

There has always been an interstate rivalry between Minnesotans and Iowans. It is sometimes unfair because Iowans are too easy to pick on.

Last weekend the Iowa Hawkeyes demolished the Golden Gophers of Minnesota in an American football game. The score was an embarrassing 55-0. But, apparently there was not enough action on the football field for a couple of fans.

My favorite part of the story was:
"Walsh was released to his girlfriend and Feldman to her husband, police said."

Oh to be a fly on the wall in either of those homes.

There was one part though that really surprised me:
"Both were intoxicated, said Deputy Minneapolis Police Chief Chuck Miner."

Stupid Iowans.

Information... it is everywhere

My modest experiment to see how long I could go without finding out who won the presidential election lasted only a few hours. All I wanted to do was see if it was even possible to avoid what would be historic news (one way or the other). After all, Obama was going to be the first African-American to either win OR lose a presidential election.

Well, I found out who won thanks to the scroll on ESPN. I was just trying to watch a little football.

I could have avoided finding out if I would have shut off all electronic devices. If there is one thing that defines our modern times it is the relentless flow of information. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but it sure is something that makes modern society unique.

I recently read Undaunted Courage by Stephen Ambrose. Even as recently as 200 years ago[1], It would take days for news to travel from the East Coast to Missouri. Nothing moved faster than the speed of horse. Now information is instant. The fact that I was unable to avoid the presidential information is not surprising but yet impressive.

[1] in the grand scheme of human events, 200 years is nothing.

Vote

If you are eligible to vote in the USA, please do so. I did. It took me 3 minutes, literally. I walked in, they checked my name and ID, I signed, got a ballot, voted right-wing-ultraconservative-nut-job across the board and dumped my ballot into what looked like a shredder. I'm assuming it was a shredder.

For those of you who stood (or will stand) in long lines, ha ha!!!!

Now, how long do you think I could go without finding out who won the presidential race.

I'm going to try a little experiment and see how long I can go without finding out. Any bets on how long I can go? I have a meeting first thing in the morning, so that will be tough. If I don't turn on my internet, I should be OK. It's worth a try.

ouch!!!!!

For several years, I have been involved in fantasy football. I love football and I love fantasies. What's not to like?

If you don't know what fantasy football is, you may want to stop reading. I'm not going to explain it, but I will say this, fantasy football is a way for the athletically untalented and the otherwise incompetent loser to pretend to be the big shot running a professional sports team. It makes me feel like a big man when I make decisions that help me win.

To be successful at fantasy football, one must make several decisions. Often it is a crap shoot, but sometimes it is an easy choice. Like should I start Adrian Peterson or Darren Sproles. Easy.

To make good decisions, you need a lot on information. One piece of info is the injury report. It really sucks when a player is a game-time decision and you don't find out they are out of the lineup after the first play. By then it is too late.

I was surprised to find out this week that my #1 tight end, Kellen Winslow, has a certain affliction. Apparently his testicles have swollen to the size of grapefruits. OK, that sucks (mostly for him of course, but this affects me to).

What shocks me the most is that he is still listed as "questionable" which means there is a 50-50 chance he will play! What!!! He's got a pair the size of grapefruits and he might play?!?!?
If my boys are ever the size of any citrus fruit, I'm taking the day off.

Sure, these reports have not been confirmed and they may be false, but when has the internet ever provided inaccurate information?